Joke Description:
> > > >> WARNING, WARNING WARNING!! > > > >> > > > >> If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes," delete it immediately. > > Do > > > not > > > >> open it. Apparently, this one is pretty nasty. It will not only > > erase > > > >> everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on > > disks > > > >> within 20 feet of your computer. It demagnetizes the stripes on all > > your > > > >> credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the > > tracking > > > >> on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's > > you > > > >> attempt to play. > > > >> > > > >> If you drive a Ford, it will start missing like a Chevy. It will > > program > > > >> your phone auto dial to call only your mother-in-law's number. This > > > virus > > > >> will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It will drink all your > > beer. > > > >> > > > >> For god's sake, are you listening? > > > >> > > > >> It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you are > > expecting > > > >> company. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with > > > >> Rogaine, all the while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind > > your > > > back > > > >> and billing your Visa card. It will cause you to run with scissors > > and > > > >> throw things in a way that is only fun when someone loses an eye. > > > >> > > > >> It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs > > to > > > >> passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings that > > grossly > > > >> change the interpretations of key sentences. > > > >> > > > >> If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a Windows 95/98 environment, > > it > > > >> will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in > > > >> dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will not only remove the > > > forbidden > > > >> tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your > > skim > > > milk > > > >> with whole milk. > > > >> > > > >> PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN! > > > >> > > > >> If you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds you'll fart so > > hard > > > >> that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of > > you, > > > >> sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you. > > > > > > >
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